Rx for Writers

Transcripts

Thursday, September 16, l999

MODERATOR is Kristi Holl, Web Editor for the Institute's web site. Kristi is author of more than twenty juvenile novels and has taught writing at the Institute of Children's Literature for l5 years.

Karen is Karen O'Connor. Karen has written over 35 books for children and adults and over 300 magazine articles, and will have her own column in 2000 in The Wesleyan Woman. According to Karen's experience, many writers (new and veteran) jump ship because of disappointment, discouragement, demands from outside sources, and dilemmas they don't know how to manage. Karen is a voice of encouragement, exhorting writers to see writing as a 'call' or 'gift,' not just a pastime or a way to make money.

Names color coded in blue are audience members who had questions.

Interviews are scheduled for Thursday evenings: 8 Eastern, 7 Central, 6 Mountain, and 5 Pacific.

MODERATOR: Welcome and good evening! Tonight we'll be hearing an inspirational talk by Karen O'Connor on a subject near and dear to every writer's heart: continuing to write in spite of disappointment, discouragement, demands from outside sources, and dilemmas we don't know how to manage. Karen has written over 35 books for children and adults and over 300 magazine articles, and she's here tonight to share with us her secrets to remaining a writer "for the long haul." Hello, Karen!

Karen: Hello, everyone!

MODERATOR: Karen, when we're beginning writers, "getting started" seems to be the hardest thing we face. However, we don't have to write very long before we realize "keeping going" is every bit as much of a challenge. Before we talk about "maintaining our writing vision," I know our viewers would like to hear how you yourself started writing--and under what circumstances. Can you tell us about that?

Karen: I started in grade school. Teachers in third and fourth grade saw my ability with words (spelling, reading) and they encouraged me. I loved to write and often did. Carried on with this into high school where I worked on school papers, etc. Then when my children were all in school I took writing courses and have continued to do so. Even now as a professional I never stop learning. That's what I love about writing. It's an adventure for the long haul.

MODERATOR: What types of books and articles have you written?

Karen: I've written over 20 books for children and young adults, mostly nonfiction. I love research and learning about topics that I wouldn't normally know anything about. I also write inspirational and how-books for adults in the Christian market, and I am a speaker in churches, at conferences and for professional associations. All of my work is related to writing and speaking...I'm a word junkie!

MODERATOR: Did publication come easily to you, or were there rejections?

Karen: There were enough rejections at first--to wallpaper my family room--but I didn't let that discourage me. I fell in love with writing from Day One and decided it would be my career--no matter what. That's where I got the notion that if I was going to write--really write--I'd commit for the long haul.

MODERATOR: How do you not take rejections personally?

Karen: It's hard not to take them personally. At first we do feel that it is US that are being rejected (not good English there, sorry) but after awhile, I saw them as 'hidden gifts.' They are to learn from. They made me a better writer and a more sensitive writer.

Ducky: What was your first sale?

Karen: My first sale was to a small boy's magazine, CRUSADER. I wrote an article called "A Trail of Tips for First-Time Campers." I made the princely sum of $12.50 and the moment I saw the check I called my husband and said, "Dinner out tonight--on me!"

Ducky: How long ago was that?

Karen: That was in 1974!

Willie Willow Tree: Do you think it makes a difference that you wrote nonfiction instead of fiction? Was it easier to sell?

Karen: Nonfiction comes easier to me and yes, I think it's easier to sell. I've heard that articles and other nonfiction outsells fiction two to one. Also, I like the variety nonfiction offers.

Fayb: I think that rejection is good because it makes one stronger. One has to know oneself and feel a sense of self worth in oneself. Comment?

Karen: I agree. Rejection is part of the turf, so to speak. Just as there are risks and rejections in any business, writing has its share, as well. You get to test your mettle, so to speak, to discover if you really have what it takes to make a go of it.

MODERATOR: Rejections are only one challenge writers face. What are some common disappointments and discouragements writers face at various stages of their careers?

Karen: One of the most discouraging to me is finishing a book or article and finding out that it's been 'canned.' One book I wrote a couple of years ago was completed, covers printed, copyright in place and the publisher decided to cut back on publication of so many books. Those of us who weren't selling large quantities were 'dumped.' At least that's what it felt like to me.

MODERATOR: How disappointing!

Ducky: After you have made a few sales, is rejection easier to handle?

Karen: Indeed! BUT I learned from that experience. I have since taken that book apart and used every bit of it in other writing...other books, articles, talks, etc. I've picked it as clean as a chicken with feathers!!

MODERATOR: Great advice to us all!

Fayb: What kind of encouragement do you have to give to one like myself who has just begun to write?

Karen: I want to encourage all of us, beginners and veterans, to spend some quiet time looking at one's personal and professional goals and then deciding within the quiet of your heart what you want to accomplish. For example, do you want recognition and money only...or are you willing to reach for higher goals...goals that serve your spirit and your life?

Ducky: Do you mean meditate?

Karen: I don't meditate per se, though it's a fine discipline. I do pray, spend a couple of hours a months with a creative coach, and I also write in a journal. Writing can be a lonely business, but if you LOVE it, as I do, then it becomes a joy. All parts of it are worth the effort and the disappointment. It reflects life. Nothing comes easy and when I look back at what I've done over the past twenty-five years, I am astonished and excited and immensely grateful. I don't discourage easily anymore...though I did when I was new at the game.

Willie Willow Tree: Did you feel rejection was a reflection of your writing skills or that the piece just wasn't wanted?

Karen: I felt both ways at times. When we are just getting our writing wings under us, it's easy to feel that rejection is personal. We simply don't know if we have what it takes, but as I grew as a person and as a writer, I began to see that writing was my choice. I wasn't willing to give away my power to an editor or to anyone. It was between me and my God. He gave me the talent and I wanted to use it for the purpose intended and so I am, even now. But I do want to encourage new people, if you are one of them. Writing is correspondent with your personal growth, and I think it's really important to spend time developing yourself, not just your writing.

Fayb: How does one develop a creative mind for writing?

Karen: By reading and studying in the area you wish to write about. It's all a process.

DebO: How do you deal with a blank page staring back at you?

Karen: CAREFULLY! That's a joke, sort of. I don't give my power to the page. I sit and think about what I want to write about and then start typing, even if I'm not sure where I will go. There is something freeing about getting words on paper, even if you don't have a direction in mind. You need to trust the process...it will come.

Ravena: Is swallowing one's pride a good way to get through the rejections?

Karen: Yes, it is, although I can't say you have to focus on swallowing pride. I think of it more as an opportunity to grow, to learn, to see where I need more help with my writing. New people (and I was one of them) often focus on ownership of their words instead of creating something of beauty and value for readers. But once you see your writing as a gift, you want to make that gift as beautiful and functional as possible.

MODERATOR: Here's a great question...

Ducky: I am beginning to suspect a writer is really a collector of words, names, sounds, etc. that he puts together to create his unique work of art. Do you agree?

Karen: Yes, I agree that writers are collectors of words...in many different forms, and they are also people who are alert to life...and live it fully.

Ravena: Do you find one age group easier to write for than another?

Karen: I have written for ages K-12 but I prefer the 8-12 range because of the flexibility of topics and their ability to read.

Willie Willow Tree: Is it important to write each day, even after rejection? After a piece's rejection, did you let it sit?

Karen: Yes, if you can write each day, do so. A journal is helpful, a good place to dump your hurt feelings and to sort out what you want to do next. It's important to validate yourself as a person after rejection and then to take a deep breath, roll up your sleeves and sit down at the keyboard again.

Ravena: How many rejections does it take to know a manuscript isn't going to work? (That's not just a really bad lead-in to a joke!)

Karen: Cute!! No numeric answer to that, but you can help yourself answer that question by joining a small support group for writers, where others can help you see what works and what doesn't and offer helpful advice. I stayed in one for two years and never missed a meeting when I was a new writer. I also took correspondence courses in writing in order to get specific help with problem areas from a professional who had been down the road for awhile. I can't stress enough the importance of professional help. Why try to fix the plumbing if you're not a licensed plumber? Know what I mean? Get help. It's out there and it will keep your spirit lifted and your professionalism will soar. I want to encourage each of you, wherever you are, to trust yourself more than anyone else. Do you want to write? If you do, give yourself the gift of going for it...or you'll always wonder if you missed the opportunity.

I'd like to tell you a little story. Just after I got divorced I had a children's book due at the publisher. I was living with my teen-aged daughter at the time and I was a mass of tears, fears, and feelings of being betrayed. My husband left us....flat. I told my daughter I couldn't write anymore...my life was over as I knew it. She looked me in the eye and said, "Mom, you always taught me to keep my agreements. You said you'd finish the book. Now finish it...even if you cry doing so."

MODERATOR: Wow! Out of the mouths of babes!

Karen: I was convicted by my words spoken through her. I completed the book, sent it in only a week late and later that very book won a national award. Imagine what I would have missed had I given in to my feelings and to my rejection by my husband.

MODERATOR: Inspiring story, Karen.

Willie Willow Tree: Where did you find your help? Where do you look?

Karen: I found help in the critique group, in the correspondence course and through my faith. I went back in my mind to my desire as a little kid to write books people could read and realized that the goal to be a writer had been with me all those years. I couldn't give up now.

DebO: How do you juggle your "going for the gift" and the other demands in your life?

Karen: Hard to do when you have young children or you have a career outside your home. I had to learn how to make time each time for this "thing" that is so important to me. It's different for every person...and I think we learn by trial and error. What worked for me was to tell my family how much this meant to me and to see if we could find a way to work this out so I could have this time to write.

Ducky: After your husband left, is this how you supported yourself, writing?

Karen: No, not initially. I started teaching, then did some language arts consulting for a publisher and actually my writing has always been part-time income.

MODERATOR: What about demands from OUTSIDE sources? Like your day job?

Karen: Those are the challenges that all writers face. For me, it was a matter of deciding, "How much does writing mean to me?" It meant enough that I was willing to give up some of my own activities and volunteer work. And that's something each person has to look into their heart, and ask, "Do I really want to be a writer and am I willing to do what it takes?" Or is it something that is more of a hobby, or a pastime? Either way is okay, but each person much decide that for himself.

MODERATOR: What effect does a family (especially children of various ages) have on writing?

Karen: That's another personal question. For me actually, my children were a boost to my writing since I was writing for children. I looked to them for ideas and feedback.

Ducky: Would you ever dump a project that you love because someone said no one would buy it?

Karen: That's a great question. I've pursued some projects that I was interested in, but didn't know if there was a market for them. But in general, I tend to write things that are marketable because I spent a lot of time studying the markets and I want to write what will sell.

MODERATOR: I know some writers have health issues that interfere with writing, anything from a baby's colic to a spouse's cancer or their own chronic pain problems. How do you write with this going on?

Karen: I've had health issues myself and of course there was the divorce, and it did challenge me, and slow me down, but it didn't stop me. Part of the way I dealt with those things was to keep a journal and then to write about the experience which was so challenging because I knew I could use it later in a book or an article.

Willie Willow Tree: I think that our moods can be reflected in our work. Did you see this when you where faced with hard times?

Karen: Yes, there were times when I wrote things about the divorce and I was still too close to the subject to be writing about it for publication. But it was very helpful to journal those feelings, and later when there was some degree of distance and objectivity, I was more able to write about it so that it would be helpful to my audience. For example, I wrote an article called "The Healing Power of Forgiveness". I would not have been able to write about that right after the divorce because I didn't feel forgiving. But about four years later, following personal growth and spiritual development, I began to see the gift behind the pain and I was able to write about how God healed me from my bitterness and that was, hopefully, an inspiration to readers not to focus on the circumstances, but on the value of the experience. That proved true because a counseling agency on the East coast contacted me and asked if they could reprint their article for their clients. So then I knew that I was writing from the perch of healing instead of from the pit of bitterness. Also, the journaling helps you to recall those events and how much you've grown through the experiences.

Fayb: What kinds of challenges does one face dealing with publishers?

Karen: Rejection is the main one, plus editors who have a different vision for the project than you do. For example, Franklin Watts hired me to do a series of l2 children's books. I wrote four of them. My editor left publishing, and the new editor could not and would not get behind the idea and said he wouldn't work with me on it, and the senior editor agreed with him. So they cancelled the series, but let me keep the advance. And at those points in our lives, we have the choice to be pulled down by someone else's opinion or say, "I'm a writer, and I'm going to move on and learn from this!"

MODERATOR: Is there a common reason, in your experience, why writers quit?

Karen: I don't know of any common reason, but I can think of a few examples. They give up when they're rejected. Some are too arrogant to allow themselves to learn from the experience. Some are unwilling to learn about the business side of writing and they give up because they just don't want to bother with it. And they realize writing is more difficult than they thought it would be.

MODERATOR: What kind of encouragement can you give writers, given today's tough market?

Karen: Yes, the market is glutted. It's more difficult to get published today than when I started, but there's an old saying: "Since cream rises to the top, you need to focus on being cream." In other words, be the best you can be in the area you want to write in. For example, say you want to write novels for young adults. I have a friend in San Diego, Jean Ferris, who writes in this field. She admits it is the most challenging area of writing, to write and to publish for teens, but her philosophy is, "This is what I'm gifted to do...it's what I love to do...what else would I do? And I'm GOING to do it!" Yes, she gets discouraged, and she had a dry spell for four years, but this is her call, and she's in it for the long haul.

DebO: Do you do anything special for yourself to help you get back up again after a rejection's left you feeling low?

Karen: Yes, I do. When I'm feeling really low, like I did this week, then I leave my desk and I do something wonderful for myself. For example, some of the things I do include... I go to a favorite bakery and buy a big fat muffin and buy a cup of tea and drive to the park or to the beach. I sit there for an hour, then feel sorry for myself for about five minutes. Then I tell myself, "That's a long enough pity party. It's time to move on with your day." And then I maybe do my errands and go home and get back to my keyboard!

Flo: You seem to be a very spiritual person. Do you ever put your feelings into poetry?

Karen: No. Poetry isn't a medium I particulary enjoy and so I don't even try to write it.

MODERATOR: You say you see writing as "a call." Can you explain that?

Karen: I guess, when I say "call" it's almost like a gift that has been put on you, like a mantle or a cloak...like an appointment. I think you know it in your "gut" and what we sometimes do is ignore that little voice in our "knower" and we look for agreement or validation from other people, and if we don't get it...then we doubt that we have the call or the gift or appointment. That happens frequently when we're new writers and we're still trying to get our wings beneath us. That's where the strong faith in yourself, or meditation can be helpful. Once you get past that stage and have a bit more confidence, then you proceed doing the things writers do!

Ducky: In the beginning don't you think it is reasonable to want some confirmation that what you believe about your writing is true?

Karen: Good question! Yes, I absolutely agree. And I suggest that you choose people to share your dreams with who love you and care about you and want the best for you. Too often we share our goals and dreams with just anyone, or people we know aren't really in our corner. So when we need support and validation, go to people who you know will give it to you. I think that family members, unfortunately, can sometimes be our "worst enemies." Husbands and wives, even without intending to, can sometimes frustrate our progress because they fear a change in the status quo of our family if we get committed to this writing goal. That's why I think it's important to enlist their support by sitting down with them and telling them, from your heart, how much this means to you. Talk over ways it can happen.

For example, my daughter, who is 37 and has five kids, homeschools three of the five and is the editor of a newsletter, but she's dying to write a novel. So her husband is cooperating by supporting her in choosing certain hours of the week that are just HERS for writing. That takes sacrifice on both their parts, but that's how we can reach our goals and still have our families.

judyg: How do you know what you are gifted to do when you first start?

Karen: I don't think you always know when you first start. I experimented and I tried nonfiction, fiction, advertising writing, I wrote a column for a tennis newsletter, interviews for a newspaper... I treated writing at that point like a big buffet, and I sampled various delicacies. And I found that I loved writing nonfiction books for children. Then later as I wrote more and as I grew as a person and changed and circumstances in my life changed, a new kind of writing attracted me: inspirational writing for adults. As I said before, as we grow as people, our writing grows and changes.

GO TO PART 2 OF KAREN O'CONNOR'S INTERVIEW NOW

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